We did it. We made it to inauguration day, which shouldn’t be a huge deal but let’s be honest, it felt a little touch and go for a while there. The Biden-Harris administration’s to-do list is a mile long, but they’ve already started making changes. We’re gonna skip over Biden firing three Trump appointees who are the embodiment of evil, reinstating DACA protections, and rejoining the Paris climate accord and move right on to the stuff that really matters, which is the news that President Biden has removed the Diet Coke button.
“What is the Diet Coke button” you ask?
Well, first of all, apparently this is not actual “news” and was covered at the very beginning of Trump’s presidency. I have no memory of that whatsoever, though, either because I just never saw any of the coverage or because the subsequent four year onslaught of absolute fucking hell that ensued took priority in my brain. In any case, I’m definitely not the only one who has just now been made aware of the Diet Coke button.
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The Diet Coke button is (or rather, was) a discreet red button atop an inconspicuous wooden box that sat on the Oval Office desk, and when President Trump pressed said button a butler would arrive swiftly with a glass filled with Diet Coke on a silver platter.
President Biden has removed the Diet Coke button. When @ShippersUnbound and I interviewed Donald Trump in 2019, we became fascinated by what the little red button did. Eventually Trump pressed it, and a butler swiftly brought in a Diet Coke on a silver platter. It's gone now. pic.twitter.com/rFzhPaHYjk
— Tom Newton Dunn (@tnewtondunn) January 21, 2021If someone had told me four years ago that that’s a sentence I would someday type I probably would have responded, “Is it crack?? Are you smoking crack?? Because it sounds like you’re smoking crack.”
You probably have questions. I have questions. Who was assigned to the Diet Coke button? Did they have other duties or was that their exclusive post? What was the hiring process like? Was there a special, Diet-Coke-Only mini fridge? Just how extensive is the therapy they’re for sure now going through after spending years delivering Diet Coke to Donald Trump and reflecting on the life choices that led them there during every walk to the Oval Office? I would watch the shit out of a 3-part doc-series solely about the people who manned the Diet Coke button for four years, but we’re probably not going to get one so we don’t have many answers, but we do have one undeniable fact. I hate that I’m going to say this.
Sigh.
The Diet Coke button rules.
I’m not happy about it, but it rules. Personally I hate Diet Coke, but the fact that there was an official button on a goddamn wood-finish box that could summon essentially a Diet Coke genie is, unfortunately, cool as fuck. Like that is some Scrooge McDuck shit. That is what middle schooler career fantasies are made of. That’s the American dream, baby. I understand now how people get addicted to power, because this is fucking tight.
The only thing as indisputably true as the Diet Coke button kicks ass is that anyone who agrees that the Diet Coke button kicks ass, myself included, should never be in charge of the country.
i would give it all up for diet coke button pic.twitter.com/DSnLfqWQta
— dan yang (@realDANYANG) January 21, 2021counteroffer: defund the police and keep the diet coke button https://t.co/S5ZzEnDDKf
Tom Newton Dunn Twitter Photos
— jamieloftus (@jamieloftusHELP) January 21, 2021I praised Trump for his Little Red Diet Coke Button™️ and I’m gonna need some time to adjust to its unceremonious removal. https://t.co/9wg8APNKvU
— Jon Cryer (@MrJonCryer) January 21, 2021Ngl having a Diet Coke button sounds tight https://t.co/Mv5O7bSmcB
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) January 21, 2021© Pool/Getty Donald Trump listens during an event in the Oval Office of the White House August 28, 2020, in Washington, D.C. The button on his desk allegedly called for a butler to bring him a Diet Coke.President Joe Biden has removed Donald Trump's supposed 'Diet Coke button' as part of the changes he has made to the Oval Office.
While in office, Trump had a red button on his desk that was said to alert a butler to bring him Diet Coke. Some Twitter users are shocked that Biden had the button removed, while others are shocked that the 'Diet Coke button' may have even existed in the first place.
Trump's love for Diet Coke has been well-documented, as is the rumor that he supposedly has 12 of the drinks a day. But the rumor that the button on his desk was used to summon the soda is news for some.
In an Associated Press report about memorable moments from Trump's first year in office, reporter Julie Pace discussed how she saw the 'Diet Coke button' in action. She described how when he pressed the button, a 'White House butler walked in with a single glass of Diet Coke on a silver tray for the commander in chief.'
Now, with Biden in office, the 'Diet Coke button' is no more, as pointed out by journalist Tom Newton Dunn, who said: 'President Biden has removed the Diet Coke button.
'When [Tim Shipman] and I interviewed Donald Trump in 2019, we became fascinated by what the little red button did. Eventually Trump pressed it, and a butler swiftly brought in a Diet Coke on a silver platter. It's gone now.'
President Biden has removed the Diet Coke button. When @ShippersUnbound and I interviewed Donald Trump in 2019, we became fascinated by what the little red button did. Eventually Trump pressed it, and a butler swiftly brought in a Diet Coke on a silver platter. It's gone now. pic.twitter.com/rFzhPaHYjk
— Tom Newton Dunn (@tnewtondunn) January 21, 2021Twitter users were quick to joke about the 'Diet Coke button', like Emmy Bengston, who imagined how the conversation telling Biden about the button would have gone: 'I would've paid so much money to get to be in the room for the conversation that I imagine went like:
BIDEN: ok what's next
STAFFER: setting up the Oval. Photos are all done. Do you want to keep the Diet Coke button?
BIDEN:
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BIDEN: the what in god's name button'
Bengston followed up her tweet and said: 'although honestly I'm surprised he didn't want to turn it into an ice cream button'
I would've paid so much money to get to be in the room for the conversation that I imagine went like:
BIDEN: ok what's next
STAFFER: setting up the Oval. Photos are all done. Do you want to keep the Diet Coke button?
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BIDEN:
STAFFER:
BIDEN: the what in god's name button https://t.co/cDhkmqzjr5
— Emmy Bengtson (@EmmyA2) January 21, 2021Emily Nussbaum also seemed surprised that the button was removed, saying: 'I very much want a Diet Coke button, it's the only part of being President that seems appealing.'
I very much want a Diet Coke button, it's the only part of being President that seems appealing.
— Emily Nussbaum (@emilynussbaum) January 22, 2021
Other Twitter users were shocked to hear that Trump may have even had a 'Diet Coke button' in the first place, like @shoopdahoop25 who said: 'FAMILY GUY WASN'T JOKING ABOUT THE 'DIET COKE BUTTON'?'
Family Guy referenced the 'Diet Coke button' in the 2019 episode 'Trump Guy' which sees four butlers bring in four cans of soda while Trump is fighting Peter Griffin.
FAMILY GUY WASNT JOKING ABOUT THE 'DIET COKE BUTTON'? pic.twitter.com/RvHtwyqWK8
— shoopdahoop25 (@shoopdahoop25) January 21, 2021Tom Newton Dunn Twitter Images
Twitter user @harpybones summed up how a lot of people seem to feel with Confused Woman meme, saying: 'biden has removed the diet coke button' all of us: there was a diet coke button........?'
'biden has removed the diet coke button'
all of us: there was a diet coke button........? pic.twitter.com/KpqTusaEhw
— ?△flavortown socialist△? (@harpybones) January 21, 2021Related Articles